Today I remembered a funny story I’d like to share. Our kids have been very high maintenance lately with sickness and attitudes and all the other stuff kids go through. We love them but sometimes I have to bust out into “Jesus Take the Wheel” both as a prayer and for comic relief to help me keep my sanity.

So today was one of those days and I broke out in to “Jesus Take the Wheel”, but this time I remembered a ride in the car from about a year ago. We were riding down the road (in our minivan) and talking with the kids about different stuff when we started talking about Jesus and how he is always with us. They said, “is he in the car?” and we told them yes he is always with us wherever we are. They both turned around and tried looking for him in the back seat saying “Jesus, are you back there?” That is precious…

They still don’t really understand how Jesus is always with us but we can’t ever see him. One day I’ll explain to them how Jesus isn’t in the back seat – he’s in the drivers seat. But if I tried to tell them that now I can guess what the next comment would be, “Daddy, YOU’RE NOT JESUS!” Kids are so honest.

I just remembered a story about Devin that is worth telling even though it happend probably a year and a half ago.

Devin was home with just me while I was busy working, so I wasn’t able to give him much attention (ok, I wasn’t able to give him any attention at all). He’s always been such a good kid I can usually just keep an open ear and tell what he’s doing.

On this particular day I was working away and listening for the little sounds of Devin playing with toys and making little boy noises with cars and stuff like that. Then it got really quiet, but I didn’t notice the silence until it was too late…

When I realized there was an odd silence I listened very intently to pick up on another sound – you know, just to confirm he was still alright. Well, I heard a little rustling from the bathroom. I thought to myself that he may have been going potty (seems like he was potty training at the time). Then I realized the rustling wasn’t the sound of him going potty. Something was going on with the shower curtain. Then another noise sounded like something squirting from a bottle.

I jumped up and ran from my desk just knowing that I would find an empty shampoo bottle and a puddle of shampoo in the bathtub – or maybe at worst the puddle would be on the floor. Was I in for a surprise. As I got close enough to actually see what Devin was doing I noticed him making a sudden whipping motion with his arm – and there was a bottle in his hand. Now I’m thinking how great it was going to be to clean up shampoo being slattered all over the bathroom. (all this went through my mind in the 2 seconds it took me to get to the bathroom)

So when I actually got to Devin I noticed that it wasn’t shampoo at all. It was bathroom cleaner – like soft scrub except it was really an equivalent product we occasionally order from this web site we’re affiliated with. He had gotten this bottle out of a box that had arrived via fedex and was still sitting on the floor in our dining room. He had taken the bottle to the bathroom, flipped the little lid, and squirted this bleach containing product all over everything in the bathroom. When the bottle wouldn’t squirt anymore he was smart enough to twist the lid off (3 yrs old) and sling the bottle to make the leftovers come out. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

As gently as I could with all the understanding in the world that he was only 3 – I said something and took the bottle from him and proceeded to wipe up some of the mess to assess the damage (you know – bleach on walls and shower curtain, rug, etc..). Little did I know there was a second bottle of this stuff in the fedex box, and while I was wiping Devin was gone to get the second bottle. I turned around and there he stood twisting off the cap to unload a second bottle – with me standing there! At this point I was less than gentle. My memory is blurry after that because I was so mad. I don’t remember spanking him (because I try not to do that while angry) or even punishing him at all. But I will never forget that moment of early mischievous from my son.

I blamed myself and took it as though he was starved for attention because I was so busy. From then on my open ear is a little more keen when I’m at home with one of the kids by myself, and I do everything I can to give them a little more attention.

It’s been a while since I simply copied somebody elses writing on my blog, but I just read what you see below. The story about the problem he is having getting his rich kids in to some elite school doesn’t relate to me – I’m not rich. But the part about public school failure is very sobering. He mentions some of the reasons Shawna and I really want to home-school our kids at least til they’re old enough to have a strong foundation of what WE are teaching them. If they want to go to school later on we’ll have to explore the possibilities. This is a big deal and we’re just praying we get it right.

Has the Public School System Failed Us?

By Michael Masterson

In Seattle, a group of white parents are suing the local school board because their children were denied admission to a predominantly white school. The reason: The school was trying to achieve “racial integration.”

But the school district was implementing the policy because it had been sued a few years ago by another group of white parents – those who wanted quotas to be used because they felt it would be beneficial. A look at the school district’s admission policies by The Wall Street Journal revealed that the school has been jumping over and back over the integration rule in reaction to threats by affluent white parents.

The same thing, apparently, is going on in Louisville, KY and elsewhere around the country.
That doesn’t surprise me. People will generally push to satisfy their personal agendas. But most people – including educated, affluent white parents – flip-flop on complicated issues, because the causes and the effects are not well known.

The Seattle case is going all the way up to the Supreme Court. Will that resolve it?

Almost certainly not. History tells us that situations change but people don’t. How school integration looks in your school district will change as demographics, policies, and practices change – even if the underlying regulations stay the same. On an individual basis, people’s perspectives on school segregation can change depending on what happens to their own children. The Seattle battle began that way.

This is the problem with trying to solve big, social problems in big, governmental ways. The solutions are almost always at least partially ineffective and temporary. That doesn’t mean one shouldn’t work for political change – but it does suggest that the practical person will look for personal ways to deal with his personal situation.

In this case, for instance: What is the personal way to deal with the problem of having your kids excluded from a presumably better, white-majority school in your local neighborhood?
How about taking personal responsibility for the quality of your kids’ education? How about seeing this as an opportunity to get more involved with their curriculum, to spend time tutoring them (or hire someone to help them), to be stricter with them about the time they spend studying? What’s wrong with that?

Is it unfair because that should be the state’s job?

Nowhere in the Constitution is there the guarantee of a good education. We have come to believe that we have such a right in America, because we believe that educated people generally make better citizens (although I’m not sure there is any evidence of that). But the history of public education in the U.S. is the history of going from good to bad, and then from bad to terrible.
How terrible is it? Well, despite the fact that spending on all elementary and secondary education nationwide was more than $500 billion during the 2003-2004 school year – one of the highest expenditures for education in the world (according to the National Center for Education Statistics) – American students are not performing at the same level as many of their peers in other countries.

In the last TIMMS (Trends in International Mathematics and Science Study) survey completed in 2003, U.S. eighth graders ranked 15th out of 45 countries in mathematics. They did a little better in science, ranking 9th.

Closer to the home front, graduation rates indicate another problem area. According to data from the Washington, D.C.-based National Center for Education Statistics, our high school graduation rate in 2005 was 68.3 percent. That boils down to a little less than one-third of U.S. students leaving high school without a diploma.

And the cost of dropping out is high. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, a high-school dropout has an annual salary of only $23,400 as a full-time worker.
There shouldn’t be any debate about it. We all want our children to be better educated, but our efforts to teach them in public schools have failed miserably.

Still, most people don’t want to give up. “If we just had more minority teachers… or better computers… or less English literature and more Spanish…” We keep tinkering with the machine, but the machine is spitting out ignoramuses.

As a parent who loves your children, you don’t have to fix the public school system in order to give them a good education. All you need to do is invest more of your own time and money in achieving this very worthwhile goal.

Repeat after me: “My children are my responsibility. If I want them to have a good education, I must be in charge of that education. I must do what I must – which always means caring, but also devoting time or money or both – to give them the education that I want for them. I will not expect my school district to do this job for me. I won’t wait for my school district to find a solution. I will handle the job myself. Starting immediately.”

Good news for people who worry: Just about every political problem has a personal solution. If you are willing to accept the responsibility to feed and clothe and educate yourself and your family, 90 percent of the world’s problems will become secondary issues for you.

Soccer season is over. We (Blue Thunder) had our awards banquet last week. It was a great joy watching 12 kids all under six years old learn to play and love the game of soccer. They made it so much fun. Their parents made it so much easier with their support (I was so afraid I would have conflicts with parents, but everyone was great). My assistant coach and his wife, Ray & Mandy Orzechowski, were a tremendous help in every way. And last but not least my amazing wife was so helpful and especially tolerant of me throughout the season when I would sometimes spend hours tuning out the real world because I was thinking about soccer.

The coaching experience has taught me a few things and brought back parts of me that I had lost touch with. I learned new things about dealing with a group of small children. Being patient and remembering that they’re kids and letting them have a good time sums it up. I learned new things about working with other parents and coaches. I learned new things about leadership and character.

Some things I learned because I have children. Some things I learned by watching other parents. Some things I learned from other coaches (good or bad).

I’ll go ahead and get it out about the bad coaches – and I want to do it like I’m talking to them because some stuff really ticks me off. First of all, the rules are written in plain English, so read and follow them correctly – if you need help interpreting them I have a pretty strong command of the English language. Second thing, the kids’ safety is most important, so tame that brat who is intentionally knocking everybody down or put him on the sideline. I had an aggressive player too and I could have put him toe to toe with anybody to “teach a lesson”, but it was more important to show him how to focus his energy on playing with skill and sportsmanship. Last but not least, the kids are four and five, so stop yelling at them condescendingly. Some of you are acting like these kids are playing for the high school championship already. High school kids will play even if their coach is a butthole because they love the game. Four and five year olds will never learn to love the game if you don’t shut your stupid mouth. You wouldn’t get away with talking to my four year old the way I saw some of you doing. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

Now back to something more positive. The good coaches were patient with the kids, allowing them to have fun over winning. (We weren’t supposed to “keep score” because an emphasis on winning or losing isn’t that important at four and five years old. I used to not agree with this, but I understand now because half of my team either couldn’t keep track of the score or thought they won by being the individual who actually kicked it in. So we didn’t focus on score. But between me, the other dads, and the kids who did understand – we were 7-1-2 for the season – that’s really good). The good coaches were effective teaching the kids how to play by doing the right drills and exercises. The best coaches taught their team sportsmanship and love of the game.

I’ll never say I’m the best coach, but I feel like I do a good job. I plan on volunteering some of my time to bring some of the players together in the off season to help develop their skill, sportsmanship, and love of the game. That’s the least I can do to try and be a good coach. It’s something I can do for my son and enjoy for myself. It’s something I can always be learning and improving myself, and it’s just a bonus that it involves a long time passion of mine – soccer.

I don’t mean to be so sentimental lately, but I have to share this. You probably can’t relate to me if you don’t have kids, but this story made me cry like crazy. I thought it was made up til the undeniable clip at the end. You gotta check it out to know what I’m talking about.