Catalyst 2008

October 16, 2008 by Leave a Comment

Last week I had the opportunity to go to this conference. It was excellent – there is no other word for it. Here are some quick highlights:
  • The biggest floam ball you’ve ever seen. 12,000 people were there, everyone had a piece of floam. Put them all together and it had to be the largest ball of floam ever formed.
  • One of the MC’s, Lanny Donoho, was crazy. At different times throughout the event he did lots of crazy stuff, including bringing in a pig, a donkey, an elephant, a bus, and he did a hilarious video with Jeff Foxworthy.
  • Jeff Foxworthy was there talking about ministry he’s been a part of – thought that was really cool.
  • They had a group of those guys who do slam dunks off the trampolene and they did high-flying dunks to raise $10,000 for Hoops of Hope. 
Filed Under: Business, Faith, Personal Growth

Emotional Moment at Live Free Live Loud Concert

July 25, 2008 by Leave a Comment

The third annual (I think it was the third one) Live Free Live Loud concert was a few weeks ago at the Anderson Civic Center ampitheater (or whatever it’s called).
Of course we forgot our camera so the only pictures we have are from my
phone. Here they are:

Devin and his buddies Ethan, Elliott, and Brody. They’re watching the
fireworks that were shot off when it was still daylight. 


Skyler and her friend Olivia sitting with Mr. Eric watching the daylight
fireworks.

Kylee sleeping through the fireworks.

Here’s what happened that was so emotional. On the way out of the
ampitheater (or whatever it’s called) was dark and there were so many
people. I was pulling our wagon full of stuff with one hand and holding
Devin’s hand with the other hand. Shawna was pushing Kylee in the stroller
with one hand and holding Skyler’s hand with the other hand. Devin was
holding an umbrella in the opposite hand from the one I was holding.
Obviously we all had our hands full. The last words we said to both Devin &
Skyler as we began to walk in the crowd was ‘DO NOT let go of mommy &
daddy’s hands’.

The problem was the pants Devin had on that night were a little too big
around the waist (or they were just stretchy enough that the more he played
the looser they got). As we were walking along and talking to some friends
that were walking beside us Devin’s pants began to fall. Worse than that
was I didn’t know what was happening. We got almost out of the ampitheater
and I became abruptly aware of the situation. I don’t remember exactly what
happened other than somehow I finally looked down in Devin’s direction
beside me and noticed his shorts were around his ankles. I hoped it had
just happened and we hadn’t been walking along like that very long. I
immediately stopped and let go of the wagon and helped him pull his pants
up. Devin was so embarrassed. He grabbed his shirt to pull it over his
King Kong underwear, and looked up at the people behind us who began to
laugh. (It was probably a cute moment from their point of view but they
really made him feel very embarrassed and in hindsight I wish I would have
cussed and bowed up a back hand at them – men and women alike – I was ticked
later on). I’ve never seen Devin so upset with embarrassment. We quickly
grabbed our things and made our way toward the exit – this time with one of
Devin’s hands holding my hand and the other holding his pants instead of the
umbrella.

When we got out of the ampitheater and out of everyone’s way I stopped to
hold Devin who at this point was crying he was so upset. I got down on my
knees and held him and tried to comfort him. It was at that moment he said
“Daddy I tried to tell you my pants were falling but you didn’t listen”. My
heart was immediately broken into a million pieces. I had failed my son in
a way I thought I would never fail him. All I had to do was be more
attentive to him walking beside me, but instead I was too engulfed in my own
conversation with someone else.

I couldn’t help it. I broke into tears and just held Devin as close as I
could. People were walking by and I’m sure staring, but I didn’t even care
at that moment. I was now giving my undivided attention to my son. I
apologized to him over and over and told him it would never happen again,
but the tears weren’t slowing down – his or mine. So I picked him up and
carried him the remaining 100 yards or more that we had to walk to our
vehicle. At this point I was so mad at myself and the laughing people, and
crushed with the pain of failing my son – I was physically numb. Carrying a
50lb boy and pulling a 100lb wagon full of stuff, and crying like a baby.
Devin started telling me to stop. I realized my crying wasn’t helping him
calm down so I started to regain my composure.

We spent a lot of time in the car in traffic as we left and that gave us all
a closed environment to just talk it all out and work through the emotions
and frustrations. Devin expressed himself and his anger. Kids are so
innocent and forgiving. He forgave me almost instantly and forgot that I
had failed and could have prevented the whole thing by paying attention.
Instead he turned his anger and frustration at the people who made him feel
so embarrassed. He told us how mad he was at those people for laughing at
him and how he wanted to hit them and kick them. I could understand that.
He wanted to hurt them the way he had been hurt and the only way he knew how
was to physically hurt them. We helped him talk through it and understand
that it was no big deal that his pants fell down and those people didn’t
really see his underwear and they were mean for laughing but that’s just how
people are sometimes etc etc etc. He said he never wants to wear those
shorts again so as far as I’m concerned he’ll never have to wear them again
because I don’t want to give him any reason to remember that incident.

By the time we finally got home Devin was pretty much over it. I had a hard
time going to sleep that night, but when I prayed and accepted once again
that I’m not perfect and I’m going to make mistakes I was able to get over
it too. Devin hasn’t said another word about that night. It’s like he’s
forgotten all about it, which I’m thankful for.

Filed Under: Faith, Family

Snow Skiing

February 6, 2008 by Leave a Comment

A few weeks ago Perry (pastor at NewSpring) told about his terrible experience the first time he went skiing. Shawna could almost tell that story exactly the same. I took her skiing for her first time (my second time) about 8 years ago this month. She made some of the same mistakes Perry did.
She fell getting off the lift, but she managed to knock me down too so it was ugly and the lift had to be stopped. The last thing I said was “keep your poles close beside you so we don’t get tangled up”. Where did the pole closest to me go as we got off the lift? Between my legs – and we both tumbled.

Later that day we went down a hill that had some moguls. I went down first and with my superior athletic ability (and a little previous experience) I bounced back and forth down the moguls with some level of control – the way you’re supposed to do it. Then I look back and Shawna is coming straight down the moguls getting higher and higher air with each bump. When she finally fell down so she could stop I was terrified at how close she was to a small tree that was oddly right in the middle of the slope. She was laughing hysterically.

Those were great times. The best part about it was we were skiing in Colorado, not North Carolina. The difference is an intermediate slope in Colorado (no such thing as a bunny slope in Colorado) is about the equivalent of a black diamond in North Carolina – from what I hear anyway – I’ve never been mudsliding in North Carolina.

Shawna did much better the rest of that week – it just took some time and practice. I can’t wait to go skiing again one day. We loved it!
Filed Under: Faith, Relationships

Christmas Plays

December 18, 2007 by Leave a Comment

I’ve been to a lot of Christmas productions in my time. I mean – if you know me at all you know I’m a preachers kid and I have been in church enough to have seen it all. For the last 4 years or so I’ve been going to NewSpring. They don’t do Christmas productions of any sort. They would probably agree if I said they are anti-Christmas-Play. They DO NOT participate in such stuff. I can understand why – because it isn’t “part of the vision”. Ok Ok – I’ve heard it and appreciate the position and quite frankly based on the history I’ve had being involved in Christmas productions I could care less if the church I go to doesn’t do one.

BUT… I found some Christmas spirit this year and actually attended another churches Christmas production. It was at Rock Bridge and it was really very good. What a wonderful mix of ‘secular’ Christmas traditions and ‘Christian’ Christmas traditions. It was so nice to see a church put on a program that inserted the true meaning of Christmas in to settings that are up to date in our culture (or as I like to put it – not old school).

Thanks to my little brother (Matthew Asbell) for inviting me. He was in the production and he even had a short solo singing part that made us all so proud. Next year I think they should get him in with one of the dancing groups. Ballet or Tap – either one will amuse me.

Great show Rock Bridge!! 

Filed Under: Faith

Dirty Little Secrets

November 9, 2007 by Leave a Comment

This writing is a great verbalization of a perspective I learned to adopt at a very early age growing up in church.  If I were writing it I would have said more critical stuff like – I don’t care who a person is, who they know, what their position is, what they’ve done, what they’ve won, or what picture is painted of them (by them or by their friends, family, or media, or whatever) – I’m looking at whatever I see and questioning the possibility that the exact opposite is true.  I really do have doubting thoughts like “I wonder if the Pope is really pure or if he has an entourage of people protecting that image while they know there is a woman in his hotel room?”  Fill in whoever you want in the place of ‘Pope’ – Pastor, Boss, Friend, and think of infinite scenarios I question in my mind other than the ‘woman in the hotel room’ example.  Maybe I think too much…  Just read this good article. 
Behind Closed Doors
By Robert Ringer
There is much truth to the axiom “No one knows what goes on behind closed doors.” Why do we assume that people in high positions don’t have realproblems? Lacking perfection ourselves, I believe we have a psychic need for perfection in important people.
From OJ to Robert Blake… from Britney to Lindsay… from Rep. Mark Foley to Senator Larry Craig… it’s amazing the things we plebians are discovering about what goes on behind the closed doors of the rich and famous.
The topper for me in this regard was the revelation that Tom Wolfe’s “right stuff” people – our astronauts – aren’t perfect after all. That door opened to the whole world when astronaut Lisa Nowak was arrested last February and charged with the attempted kidnapping of U.S. Air Force Captain Colleen Shipman, the girlfriend of astronaut William Oefelein.
When Tom Wolfe wrote The Right Stuff, I don’t think he had valedictorian/astronaut-turned-stalker Lisa Nowak in mind. And he certainly didn’t have wigs, diapers, rubber tubing, and serrated knives in mind.
What would cause such an all-American woman to flip her wig? (Pun intended.) The first thing that comes to mind is Buddha’s admonition that “all unhappiness is caused by attachment.”
It’s healthy and wonderful to fall in love… no argument on that point. But when a person’s love is so desperate – so irrationally based – that she is willing to commit acts of violence in order to keep the object of her affection in her clutches (which, of course, wouldn’t work anyway), her psyche is definitely in outer space.
It is somewhat self-evident that anyone who would go to such extremes is lacking in self-confidence and self-esteem. Again, love is wonderful. But when it becomes a life-or-death matter, I believe it reveals a neurotic – and possibly psychotic – insecurity.
Your happiness should never depend on how another person feels about you. Happiness results from feeling good about yourself. You cannot hold anyone emotionally captive, and you should never allow anyone to do it to you.
But, lack of self-confidence and self-esteem aside, Lisa Nowak’s antics should again remind us how true it is that “no one knows what goes on behind closed doors.” In this vein, I recall being on a national talk show in the late seventies, hosted by a well-known television personality (“Mike”). We subsequently became good friends, and often socialized together.
Mike and his wife (“Barbara”) were portrayed as the ultimate glamour couple, often appearing on magazine covers together. They were the poster couple for the media’s idea of “beautiful people,” and were frequent guests themselves on other major television shows. Their specialty? Giving advice on how to sustain a healthy marriage.
On one occasion, my wife and I went with Mike and Barbara to a concert at the Greek Theater. I remember the evening vividly. After getting out of the car, Barbara and my wife walked ahead of Mike and me, giving us an opportunity to chat privately.
At one point, I made a comment about what a lucky guy he was to be married to such a beautiful and nice woman as Barbara, and how happy they seemed to be. I was stunned when he replied, “Robert, I’m not happy at all. In fact, I’m miserable. I thought when I built the house for her (a little $5 million+ extravaganza in Beverly Hills), it would improve our marriage. But, instead, things are totally unraveling.”
Soon after that evening, rumors began flying around Tinseltown about Mike’s catching Barbara in bed with a ski instructor on a vacation in Aspen – followed shortly thereafter by his finding her in bed with their gardener! Pretty ugly stuff.
Mike and Barbara have been divorced for many years now, but their sad situation still has an impact on my thinking. I’ve long taken media hype with a grain of salt, and I’m not overly impressed with titles, awards, commendations, and the like. (Remember, the Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded to Yasser Arafat and Kofi Annan!)
But it’s not just famous people whose personal realities are often far different from the perceptions they convey. There are many people in everyone’s micro-world who are perceived to be important – civic leaders, church bigwigs, school officials, wealthy individuals, and those with impressive titles (e.g., “doctor,” “lawyer,” “judge,” “director”).
It’s fine to show respect to those who have earned their way to top positions in society, but it’s a mistake to assume that they live pristine, automaton-like lives when out of public view.
Whenever I hear a sordid tale – like that of an astronaut’s psyche being stranded in outer space – it confirms my long-held belief that many people in the highest stations (e.g., those who have the authority to press the nuclear button!) may very possibly have less emotional stability than you or I.
Not much you can do about that. But you can do a lot about your own psyche by not being overly impressed with the elites around you. And by never losing sight of the reality that no one knows what goes on behind closed doors.
Filed Under: Business, Faith, Relationships

Lord’s Supper

October 28, 2007 by Leave a Comment
If you were at NewSpring this past Sunday you saw the largest print of The Lord’s Supper painting that I have ever seen – actually there were two of them, one on each side of the auditorium (I’m talking huge – 12 feet tall by 24 feet wide). People who have accepted Christ during this sermon series came down and wrote their name on the Lord’s Supper table as a symbol of their committing their life to Jesus. It was awesome.

I’m so blessed that I had the opportunity to volunteer my services to NewSpring to have those large prints produced at a company I do business with (it wasn’t the company I work for). I didn’t pay for the prints or anything but I helped Chris Dunagan find a quality source for a good price. Chris (aka Gizzard or Gizz for short) did all the real work preparing the image and all that. I just did some communicating back and forth between Gizz and the printer. It was the least I could do to help out with something I’m fairly good at – dealing in the print industry. But that isn’t what I’m wanting to write about.

The good part of this story comes in to play when Gizz and I went to Atlanta to pick up the finished project. The owner of this company asked us what we were doing with these two huge prints of the Lords Supper. This is the good part and I would try to re-verbalize it but I wouldn’t do justice to what Gizz said. It was just amazing the way Gizz explained to this guy what was being done with these huge prints and what it would symoblize for those going through a life changing experience of accepting Christ.

It was one of the best examples of witnessing I have ever seen. In fact when we left there I said “that guy just got witnessed to and he don’t even know it”. What Gizz did is planted a seed. I also told Gizz that I’ve met that guy before but don’t know anything about his beliefs, but if he isn’t a Christ believer he will definitely be thinking about it after the way Gizz planted that seed.

Gizz is one of the most passionate people on staff at NewSpring. He stands out above most in my opinion – not to take anything away from the others. He knows his role, stays true to vision and leadership, and does what he loves with a deep level of passion and conviction.

And in case you ever need their services – Chris (Gizz) and his wife Jessica are both graphic designers and do freelance work when they have time. They are expecting a baby too so if they’re anything like us they will be open to extra income.

Filed Under: Faith

More Stupid Church Stuff

October 16, 2007 by Leave a Comment

Here I go again – talking about church:
  • Clayton King spoke at our church this past Sunday. I love listening to this guy. He mentioned ‘playing both ways’ on his high school football team. I can sooo relate to that, and I’m just like he was – it wasn’t that I was so good – it was because as a team we were that bad. When people ask me what position I played in high school I have to answer witha run-on sentence.
  • The message Clayton was sharing was about defending the pastor. He made some references about how pastors can be over worked and under paid and talked about how traditional, or ‘classical’ as he put it, churches are the worst about it. He referenced some tough situations he’s seen preachers’ families go through and some lessons he’s learned in his own family relationships. He said something like ‘it’s no wonder so many preachers kids grow up to hate church because of what the church people put preachers’ families through’. I can sooo relate to the statements he was making. Not to sound ‘woe is me’ or anything, but it is truly a miracle that my siblings and I stepped foot in church after we were old enough to say ‘NO’ to our parents. Maybe that was God’s purpose for my dad stepping out of pastoral ministry when we were teenagers.
  • Speaking of stupid church people. (here’s where the really ‘stupid’ part of this post comes in). It was very ironic at one point in Clayton’s message he mentioned the Jimmy Swaggart and Jim Baker scandals that took place back in the 1980’s. I remember all that crap too even though I was young. I remember my family had just been to the PTL place right before their scandal was revealed (I remember a water park mostly and a bunch of boring church stuff). Anyway, that’s not the stupid part or the ironic part. The irony of Clayton mentioning that in his message was because just the day before someone else mentioned Jimmy Swaggart – at our yard sale. This is the stupid part. This stupid church lady (I don’t feel bad for saying that) was looking through some books we had for sale and noticed we had a lot of Christian material. She made sure to tell us she loves Jimmy Swaggart and thinks he is the best one she ever watches on TV. I was humored and simply let her express her admiration for a man I remember failing big time but I suppose is redeemed by grace – or at least I hope since he is still preaching in the name of Jesus. Then this lady got to a book in the stack titled ‘Purpose Driven Church’ and she started talking stupid. She was saying something about how Rick Warren, the author, is the anti-christ or some crazy crap like that. I was so shocked I didn’t catch half what she said It didn’t make sense anyway. It was probably her vague translation of some off the wall theory made up by a back woods preacher at a Bible study that took place in a trailer park down by the river. I just know she was saying some pretty stupid stuff about Rick Warren that I could never believe to be true based on what I’ve read or heard myself about the man. I wasn’t humored and I didn’t entertain her ignorance. I basically turned my back to her and started talking to Shawna about something else. The lady left right after that thank goodness.
Stupid people never cease to amaze me – especially in church.
Filed Under: Faith

Links of the Day

September 26, 2007 by Leave a Comment

There is lots of good stuff in the feeds I subscribe to. Here are some share-worthy posts in case you don’t feed on them already:
Filed Under: Faith, Money

Satanic Subtlety

September 20, 2007 by Leave a Comment

I’ve mentioned before that my brother Matt goes to RBCC. So sometimes I listen to their pastor Matt preach either on CD’s that my brother Matt gives me or online.

The other day I was catching up on the ‘One’ series they did and the a side point was made about how satan does subtle things to get us off course. The way Matt (pastor Matt) illustrated it was to make an example of changing the time on someones clock by 15 minutes. They probably wouldn’t notice when they woke up but it would be enough to make them late. If it was off by an hour they might notice because light and dark can completely change in an hour, but 15 minutes would be subtle.

The point was to equate that example to how satan puts subtle temptations in our life to cause us to fall in to sin. An example in context of a subject I’ve discussed on here is how satan might not put a real person in your path to tempt you in to a cheating relationship but he might put some porn in front of you that doesn’t seem as bad to you. Next thing you know you’ve sinned and sin is sin. It doesn’t matter if it’s as seemingly harmless as seeing a nudy picture or as wreckless as having an affair. Both are sin and sin is sin.

I thought the subtle time change was a very good illustration. It was easy to imagine someone becoming majorly frustrated because they show up 15 minutes late for work or school and can’t seem to figure out why. The effectiveness of that illustration on me got my odd little brain thinking…

What if a church did that illustration literally rather than just saying it on stage. That wasn’t the main message RBCC was trying to teach that day so it wouldn’t have been appropriate, but what if the message was primarily about how easy it is to drift in to sinful behavior? Couuld the clock analogy be done literally to prove the point?

I think it could. I’m thinking of how NewSpring does things with their atrium depending on what the current message series theme is. (anytime I think of creativity two groups of people come to mind – NewSpring because I go there and see what they do, and corporate advertisers because I work with them all the time for printing).

So what I’m thinking is there could be big clocks in the atrium at NewSpring with the wrong time, maybe only 10 minutes ahead, and everything happening at NewSpring that day is happening by the time on those clocks. The countdown til service starting would be in sync with those clocks. The band would come out to the time on those clocks and begin playing music…

I think you get the picture. Everyone would be so confused and frustrated. People would be asking each other “Is that time right?” and everyone would be checking their cell phone because the time on those is supposed to always be right, but nobody would know what to believe because the service is starting. People like me would be frustrated because they’re late. I’ll bet there would be some interesting reactions.

By the time all the ‘on time’ arrivers are in the auditorium the person doing the greeting/announcements can come out. People will be thinking they have lost it. Just so they don’t get too mad that they missed all the music the band can do a bit more after the greeting before the preacher comes up. When the preacher comes up he tells the confused audience what they’ve just experienced and leads in to the message that explains the parallel.

I think this would be sooo funny, even if it happened to me, and it would be a great literal illustration of a point. You might be thinking this is a cruel idea. But I remember a service where Perry spent about 15 minutes telling this big ole story about how he met Tim McGraw and Faith Hill at a restaurant and then he made out like he had invited Tim McGraw to NewSpring and he was there about to come out on stage. Everyone stood up and erupted with cheering and applause. Perry laughed for 5 more minutes before he followed that tricky illustration with a sermon that made a point. Is changing the clocks to make people ‘late’ any worse than making everyone stand up and cheer like idiots for someone who wasn’t really there? 

Filed Under: Faith

Rarely Stolen Items From a Fellow Jesus Freak

September 12, 2007 by Leave a Comment

Last week as I was traveling I heard a radio show host speaking of an incident he had recently been through. A thief had taken UPS packages off his porch while he was at work. He couldn’t figure out why in the world they had not delivered yet so he called the company he had ordered from and they eventually figured out there is a thief stealing packages in the area.

What was ironic was the goods that were in the box. He had ordered some Christian CD’s of various types off the internet. There were some preaching CD’s and I think he said there were some Christian books on CD and maybe even some Christian music on CD. You have to assume the thief didn’t know that’s what he was stealing and you have to wonder what he thought when he opened the box to find all that stuff. I imagine Christian goods being stolen is probably a rare occurrence.

What I thought was even more unexpected than what got stolen was who it was stolen from. If you live in upstate SC or have ever been here for any amount of time you have heard of the popular radio station B93.7 and their morning radio show hosts Hawk & Tom. These guys are hilarious along with Kato and Heidi.

Anyway, you can listen to these guys long enough to tell Hawk is the one with the best head on his shoulders and who really knows about the rest (my opinion). I had wondered before if they are Christian or not even though they are on the secular radio station (there is nothing wrong with that). Now that I heard Hawk tell his story of having all those Christian materials stolen from his front porch and make the statement “I like to listen to all that stuff during the week too” I think it is safe to assume Hawk is a Christian. I was very glad to hear this.

Now I’ll be praying that he can first of all withstand the others around him and second of all that he can be an example to them that they need Jesus. I think Tom needs brains first and then he needs Jesus, and Kato might be alright if he stops listening to Tom. Heidi just needs to stop hugging her tree and maybe she’ll listen about Jesus too.

I’m just kidding. I don’t really know any of those people and I could have them all wrong for all I know. All I know is what I hear come out of their mouth on the radio. But I think it took some guts for Hawk to mention that he is a Christian on the radio show that he is on and I commend him for taking that stand. 

Filed Under: Faith, Misc
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